Question Mark Guy Part 5
Saturday, 13 February 2010
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Question Mark Guy #5
Profile Name: Stalker Line 1
Age: Lord Knows
Ok, so from the beginning I was on twitter one day, just minding my own, until Industry hater pressed a button in his small little brain and decided to go at me on this "Every girl in the industry is a whore/slut/skank, and sleeps around to elevate their career" tip with me. FAAAAAAAACK OFF! To be honest he didn't strike a raw nerve because if that was true I would have shagged Chris Lighty when we met, knocked myself up, bribed him and got rich along time ago... I would have 'elevated' myself so much I would be living on Miami Beach, with a fine brudda working for Nikki Minaj consulting her on how to 'elevate' herself and her career. INSTEAD, I'm stuck in London (and I mean that in the nicest way possible) grafting the same way every one else is... The paying taxes way... So while I'm reading books like "Grab yourself a Millionaire husband" and "Change your life in 7 Days" I'm thinking, did the person who wrote the first book even grab themselves a millionaire? And did the author of the second write the book in six days like God created the earth, rest on the seventh and hand everything over to their agent to handle all the dirty work and watch the money come in? Either way, the books haven't done anything for me so do I get my money back?
Moving on, after having a bit on cheap banter on twitter with Industry Hater (I.H) a few weeks went by where he kinda left me alone, not that I cared, I mean it was entertaining for a while until... (I'm sorry bubs but I have to mentio you coz you are sort of part of it) Silvar was having a conversation about me to I.H, I don't know the specifics coz I didnt see the full convo but out of no where I.H gives Silvar my number openly on twitter like its a retweeted quote off Rev Runs Wisdom... AND THEN just for his own spice, he decides to tweet my number again saying contact Zanna for PR yadda yadda yadda. FOOL. Now I didnt see this message until two hours AFTER it was posted. Pause. So by the time I checked my phone I had like 14 direct messages from friends telling me, LORD KNOWS how many people retweeted it and masses of tweets from people saying how much of an asshole he is, it wasnt until I scrolled all the way down when I found the Pussy Popper had Posted my Private number up in Public... PRICK. After my phone had nonstop no ID callers throughout the night I turned my phone off...
Anyway, if your thinking is this blog about I.H? Nope, But I am getting there... OK so after his little run, I got this friend request on facebook but I didn't think it had any sort of connection with twitter. When I write things on twitter it get posted straight to facebook, and this guy that I had excepted on facebook started commenting on every single status that was on my FB. Now I didnt think anything of it not even when he went through all my pictures and commented on them too... I mean there are people out there that do that.
Anyway... I didn't think anything of it, I just ignored it, I never said anything back to him, even when he started to send me stuff like this...
Lol! this was the first message he sent me and I just ignored it, I think he was replying to one of my statuses on my facebook in my inbox, I thought creep... but just kept it moving. Then he sent me this like an hour after the first message.
Now, ok... forgive me if I'm wrong but how can you claim someone to your soul mate if you haven't even spoken to, let alone met? Is that whats happening at the moment? Craig David, Baby I love you but FILL ME IN! WTF?
Anyway, Just to spice things up a bit on here I thought I'd be a bit evil... Only a little... OK ALOT... so hes sending me messages more and more of them, and I'm not sending anything back... Then I get one that says:
"I read your article about ''Men In The City - My Quest To Find The Perfect Man' ...And I smiled with joy in my stomach...you know why! I've been doing a similar thing to what you've been doing...finding Mrs right not just in london but in the world...well, recently I almost gave up, but God said 'hold on, got something for you to see...that's when by a miracle , I found you in facebook" - I thought, fantastic a guy thats a fan of my blog... Thank fuck! We can all go home and enjoy the new year because the guy that is obsessed with me reads my blog. Cringe. *side eye*.
In the same message he waffles on about God a bit more and telling me abit about himself not that I care... Just saying, I mean lets be honest, If your not a Mr Midas looking brother, Resemble @Tonyblk in the slightest, look remotely like Devon Anderson (Unoe the 'New' but 'Old' Figure in Eastenders) or Trey Songz graphically telling me how you invented sex, You sending me a message on facebook about how I complete you? Nah, Im not gonna give two shits reeeeeeeeally...
So he still baffles on saying how he's in media (What a coincidence!) "I Am a good and perfect gift from Heaven. I think I've found the One new woman (who is also different from the rest), who God sent me to love...and you know what! that woman is you-Zanna...I profess it and Am willing to show it to you. I exist and I have been reserving myself for that One true 'new woman' who believes that Mr. Right exist" - Lets all clap for the guy that thinks facebook is match.com and that we can live in e-harmony because hes sent me 3 poxy messages. That one message its self goes on for ages LOL! AGES! So I'll move on... hahaha well so he continues to write his heart out, sending me pages of messages on facebook... Let me put that into perspective for you...
Well this many messages times 3... No I didnt read them all, I stopped at the first three, he just writes too much lmoa! Anyway... He sent me pictures of himself, thought I'd entertain ya'll and show you what my beloved fan looks like, its only right... right?
Ok Well lets get started... When I looked on his facebook there are no pictures of him just some stupid picture of... well I duno what it is... Anyway, his name is Immanuel King Love (Apparently)... Oh and Ladies hes single... Do you want him to take you out?
This is him up against a wall... looking sleepy wearing a stupid hat too small for his big head
And this is him again up against a wall wearing the same clothes with that hat we all know and love
This is him again up against a wall, with the same clothes and hat... Girls don't worry I'm sure he took all the audition photos on the same day *side eye*
I have a quote from the main man himself "People say I've got a 'thrillion dollar bill' smile...Ha! well, my friends say, my smile and looks can raise the dead and I don't have to say a word. O my God...what have you turned me to...Amazing! well can only thank hm for making meshine like crystal- as I sit upon his glorios throne"
So Girls! There you have it! Looks that can raise the dead, 'Friends' that tell him he can model, and who needs to have a baby by 50 cent? dang! this guys got a 'thrillion dollar bill' smile! Yes to read right! A 'thrillion dollar bill' smile! RICH! Oh man! What a catch! And right at my feet? How lucky am I?
OK now this is where I clear up why I.H was involved... This guy calls me... YES! Calls me! NO I didn't give him my number... He calls me and while I'm quietly sitting at home watching tv in bed my phone rings Me: "Hello?"
Him: (African Accent) "Hello, Zanna, Zanna its Immanuel."
Me: Pause. "Who?"
Him: "Immanuel, I send you messages on facebook"
Me: "How did you get my number"
Him: " I was on my friends twitter and saw your number on the screen so I took it down"
Me: Dialtone...
He continues to ring back a few times but I ignore the number and save it under 'Stalker Line 1'... To cut the story short he starts texting me everyday saying how much he loves me and can't wait to see me and all this bollocks... sending me like 20 texts every day. Until one day I put this message up on twitter saying I've seen these gorg shoes, anyone wanna buy them for me? 10 minutes later I get a text from him with his bank details... NO WORD OF A LIE! LOL! Ask @jamminmc I was telling him about it on the day lmfbao... So what did I do? Course I tried it out man, I was curious loooool wouldnt you be? Well for starters his name wasn't Immanuel it was 'Joseph Awhota' on the card, and he is 27 after saying in his messages to me he's 21 looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool! okok anyway, the card didn't even work, just to let you know... Idiot, I got well excited!
Well he continues to text me and one particular text he sent me scared me, he said I can't wait to meet you and see your two sisters and your mum. Now this is someone I don't speak to and is saying he wants to meet my family, to you its funny but to me, this guy had done his research... and when he started to ask me about where I live in the texts it scared me that he would start turning up at my door next. Anyway I ignored him, until one day he sent me a message saying I need to see you send me your address, I was out and I thought, you know what lemme send him AN address..."29 West India Dock Road London E14 8E2" Limehouse Police Station, now obviously I didn't tell him that I said it was my house, lol the first reply he ever gets from me is 'my' address and he probably thinks he's hit a gold mine... He called me I picked up and he goes to me, thank you so much I haven't got anywhere to stay tonight I was like cool come round.... LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL 3hours later he calls me and says hes at 'Limehouse Train Station', by this time now I was at the restaurant in soho eating about to go out on the town with my parents looool! He called me when I finished my food and was like I'm in the area now I'm nearly there lol! I'm like cool and make my way out to the bar... I didn't touch my phone for a few hours and when I was coming out the bar at 2am and driving on my way to tinsle town with my mum and dad I see 38! yes 38 miss calls loooooooooooool! this guy was calling! Then I picked up and he goes Zanna I cant find it... I could just hear loadsa noise like he was with loadsa people, I asked him who he's with and he said just my friend he's helping me find your place... Find my place my ass he's planning on moving his mum, his dad, his uncle, his nephew, his nephews friend, his friends friends and his friends in to my house...... lol can you imagine if I actually told him the address to my place and went out I'd come home and the locks would be change and he would have remorgage the place under his name and put a restraining order out on me... lol! If I knocked on the door he would be like I have lived here for years with my brothers lol!
Anyway, he calls me again and says he's found the police station where's your place? I said its 26a but if you can't find it press the help button on the police door ...My mum said just tell him to ask for PC ISSAC HUNT (ISA CUNT..) or MABOLSA RITCHIE (MY BALLS ARE ITCHY)and they will definitely help you if they're in.... My dad looked at my mum (My dad can be a correct sometimes) and goes..."noooo you can't tell her to say that" then my mum goes "yes I can" (We were both in crying in hysterics, Mum you see, when shes had a bit to drink, well she doesn't need much, but when she has... she acts very much like me, but to the extremes... we are like two peas inna pod lol)... He did aswell, its a shame that neither PC ISSAC HUNT or MABOLSA RITCHIE were in but I got a call from a women 20 minutes later on no id caller saying:
"Hi Zanna I have you boyfriend at Limehouse police station can you come and collect him he can't find your place"
Me: "Boyfriend? What boyfriend, I don't have one"
Women:Talking to Immanuel or Joseph or Whatever "Why did you say you're her boyfriend?" TooManyNamesMan:"Friend I mean Friend"
Women: "Hi Zanna, Sorry Your Friend"
Me: "What did you say his name was?"
Women:"Immanuel"
Me:"I've never met this guy in my life, he keeps stalking me"
Women:"Oh thanks for telling me that"
Dialtone...
Now I'm cracking up! Laughing about him with my parents in the car while driving to Tinsle town, It was hilarious! Well he calls me again about 30 mins after saying he's on the street he needs somewhere to sleep where's my place...
It's deep but I left him there... Two days later he was still calling my hassling me for the address of my place... Saying he has had to sleep on the street and none of his 'Friends' can help him. This guy is persistent! and this happened on Saturday just gone... He still calls me for it... Shake my head
But on a real serious note now, its actually not as funny as I make out. Anyone who is that persistent had a motive from when he tried speaking to me, the guy knew he was gonna be homeless thats what all the flattery was there for, he probably wanted to use me for a green card! But honestly! This guy could have done some serious business and found out where I lived and turned up at my yard! THATS SOME DANGEROUS SHIT!
Anyway! This is my VALENTINES SPECIAL! He text me today saying he wants to take me out and that he has a pressie for me... LUCKY ME *side eye*
Moral: Hmmmmmmm for him? Don't trust a pretty face! Hahahahahaha
Until the next time...
Oh and RIP industry hater.
Oh and RIP industry hater.
Loves ya! xxx
That day was so funny! Brapp to IM UN WELL (Immanuel)
Mum
x
hahaha dont mess with a Gemini you fool, coz theres alwayz another one lurking in the shadows!! be warned Immanuel. Great blog Zanna as alwayz xx
ps was that the day i sent u the pic of the ducks hanging in the window?? lol
STANDS AND APPLAUDS.....THAT WAS FRICKIN HILARIOUS, WHAT A GREAT READ, HOWEVER, VERY SERIOUS AND ITS GOOD U TRAPPED HIM TO THE POLICE STATION....THAT GUY CUDA DONE SUM TERRIBLE THINGS, GOD FORBID!.....BUT STILL WELL DONE FOR THE DIVERSION AND RATINGS TO THE MUST FOR THE PC ISAAC HUNT DIS!
Loved It! Fab Story It Had Me In Hysterics, U Must Keep
Us Up To Date With The 419er. Lol :)
LMAOOOO... U've dun it again
Muks
HAHAHAH this had me in stiches!!
LMAOO BBLUUUDDCCLUTT!!
HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME BBZ I THOUGHT U LOVED MEEEE :(