I Just Have To Tell You...

*Uncorks a bottle of Rose and takes a swig from the bottle...*



I've never been lucky with guys, and its funny I say that because in my group of friends I'm the first one to bag a date when I want it. Modestly speaking, I've never had an issue with being approached by guys, dating guys, going on dates, dinner, cinema, events... Whatever, it’s never been a problem with me. I'm a very confident person, I have to be... It’s a big part of my job. But I've never been lucky with guys, like I've never been in a actual relationship, or one that's lasted on that note...

*Decides to be civilized and pours wine into a glass*

Question Mark Guy #6
Profile Name: Never On My Case...
Age: 22

I rarely, and when I say rarely I mean it’s unheard of for me to become attached to someone. It’s not like I'm some ice queen or put my heart in the freezer on a daily or nothing is just I've never really had time to think about what I really need in a guy. Sometimes I feel that I get so busy I don't have the chance to sit back and evaluate what I really need. I find I almost tend to go for everything I want to give me that instant boost like some 'Relentless' Energy drink that will last me a few hours keeping me going for the time being, rather than sit down to a home cooked meal that will last me the whole day... Am I making sense?

*shuffles on sofa to get comfortable*

Ok, let me give you an example... This story has been sitting in my notes for my blog for about two months now but I've never really come to terms with whether I wanted to write about it... Oh well... Anyway...

*clears throat*

Imagine chemistry between two people that was so crazy you'd think that they reinvented science... (Don't watch the cheesy line). Man I’ll tell you the way me and this guy got on it was mad, I'd never really had that kind of (hate to be cliché) connection with someone before. Now I have a versatile personality and I tend to get on with everyone anyway, but this, this was different, it felt different, I really liked him. Really liked him. Its almost hard for me to admit it but without going on too much about this nonsense saying how we moved the planets, stars and rocked the universe and all that.(LOL sorry but I actually thought that sounded funny) I just really felt like there was a bond between me and this guy. Any guy can text my phone or call me or email me or tweet me along with the other 200 ways you can get in contact with me, and I won't care less, they're all irrelevant to me. Unless its business I don't really give too shits and all of my friends know I’ve had this head strong attitude for a while. But from the time I met this guy I just couldn't wait to be around him again. I felt so comfortable around him. I could be silly and have a laugh and crack my really not funny jokes with him and he'd laugh AT me... But to me he was still laughing and that's what sorta made me happy. The fact that I could please him. When I was with him I almost found myself trying to make him or keep him happy and that made me content while doing so.

*sigh*

But that's not it... Oh no... The way this guy would make my heart skip a beat by the way he touched me was crazy... He would hold me up against the wall hold my neck and kiss me like no ones done before, *Mmmmmm* he had the softest lips I could kiss for hours, the most amazing tattooed chest and body. Ahhhh man! This guy could kiss my neck and send shivers down my spine even while I'm on my way home and not with him. Just the thought of it now is making me quiver. Now without getting too xrated and making you lot #pausefororgasm or whatever, he was a lot... I loved being around him I loved cracking jokes with him, I loved talking to him, I even liked speaking to his mum and spending what time I could with his little brother and the two most adorable sisters who sort of remind me of my own. But from the time I stepped out of his front door, got home and went to sleep I knew we wouldn't talk again for another week or two. And that's what our relationship was like. I developed this genuine care for him out of... Well an insignificant relationship. Obviously, it never started like that but that's how it ended up a few months in...


Me and this guy, we were never in a relationship, to be honest till this day I don't know what it was... But for the sake of the blog ill keep things simple and say we were dating. We were dating for a while, and from the time we met we connected but if I think about it now, and being quite honest I was kinda a booty call…




#JustSaying I won’t front and ill be the first girl to admit that I have been suckered into being one LOOOOLOUDER! Ok ill tell you why, well… he would never call call me! EVER I used to make effort to call him etc… but then I gave up coz he never returned the favor and called me, oh but he did however use to message me on facebook! One sec let me hold the story there for a moment while I Laugh Out Loud At Myself… *cough* yeah he would only converse with me through FB and I mean I know he’s on T-Mobile and I’m on Orange but give the five day pass a rest right? Anyway yeah so our only conversation was ever through FB and to make matters worse… oh no it doesn’t stop there… it wasn't until like a few weeks into 'Dating' him that I kinda found out he was basically bum chums well best friends with a guy I dated the year before... #pause… from the time I found out I had all sorts going through my mind... There's this guy that I get on with so well and he turns out to be friends with this guy I was 'seeing' the year before... Now if it hasn’t quite sunk in to your minds about what has happened imagine this scenario in your head... close your eyes and imagine two guys (girls, for the guys reading this post) that you went out with... now imagine you seeing one of them in a rave, they have come over to you to say hi and see what your saying, until the other person comes over to hand your guy a drink... you look up and it turns out it was another guy you went out with... #pause so they have basically turned up together... and you didn’t know they were friends... WHAT WOULD YOU DO? No No not what would you do... but what would you say? It’s not the easiest thing to come out with if they ask how you both know each other... Be honest! That’s a 'grab your coat and hide in the cupboard Harry Potter Stylee' kind of situation... TELL ME IM LIEING!
Now let me tell you how I found out they knew each other... I was talking on the phone to the guy I was seeing the year before about something until I hear a voice in the back saying...' Is that Zanna?'... This is how I felt…



He passing the phone to my guy from him to say ‘Me and you need to talk’ now I already knew what we ‘Needed to talk about’ when he said those words but you know how you have to dumb yourself down abit…

Anyway, long story short he didn’t talk to me about it until like ages after but when we did talk about it he said it was cool… and the past is the past #pause now maybe I should have cut it off myself coz alie if you was in that situation you would right? Coz to me, I found out when he found out so who was to go first and say whats what? Anyway I liked him a lot so for some next unknown universal reason it didn’t raise my eyebrows into why he said it was cool… *rolls eyes*.

Well ill speed the story forward a bit. He would always drop these bottomless comments like, im going to make you m girl soon and the should make more girls like you etc etc..

*yawn*

Anyway he would feed me these sweet nothings and id fool for it… #TWAT


Anyway it was his birthday and I got him tickets to go see Joe perform with Natalie Williams at Ronnie Scotts, for valentines. Cutting this short I didn’t go with him coz I felt he was going on like a bit of a dickhead, but when I told him a week later he went into a bit of a strop and we had a lil argument I got abit teary eyed and went home… now on my way home I text him ‘I feel like I’m in love with an arsehole’ now if you know me well you will know I hate being mad or holding grudges so ill crack a dumb joke to break the ice. Except he didn’t find it too funny, and he messaged me from his good friend Facebook to say are your serious your in love with me… now obviously I wasn’t but I’m not sure what broke him more, the fact that I was saying it was a joke (even though he was probably thinking thank God) or the fact I called him an arsehole.

Anyway moving on… to break the ice again *rolls eyes* I asked him what are you doing in 2 weeks now I didn’t want to say what it was for but he said I was going on funny and said to me we should leave it their so I said cool. But what I was going to do was take him to see Omar at Ronnie Scotts coz I felt bad about being a bit of a bitch for valentines. Well in the end I took my friend Lyton @_letterL because I felt he would appreciate my time and company a lot more than this dude. And I’m glad I took him coz Ronnie Scotts is one of those places I don’t introduce anyone to unless I feel they will respect it, its just one of those places that is special to me.


Well the reason I decided to write about this because this happened earlier in the year is because he started talk to me again and I was thinking to myself do I really want to go down that road again? I do like him but ergh! He made me feel like sucha twat! And I don’t have time fi dat…

I miss the times we had but should I go there? LOL!!!!! Anyway on to the next one….